Marriage Sermons
God's Design For Marriage And Family
John Guest
The fundamental issue is whether we were designed by God or
whether we are the product of billions of years of mindless
evolution with no design at all. The predominant secular culture
propagates the latter and since it says there is no design that
is God's ultimate design, it seeks to reorder the understanding
of marriage and family to suit their own pleasures. Not to
belabor the point, but if there is no God then there is no
designer. If there is no designer, anything that appears to be
designed about human physiology, psychology and sociology is
purely fortuitous - amazing accidental design!
The Judeo Christian understanding of who we are as human beings
comes from God's revelation in the Bible. The Bible teaches that
in the beginning God was present first of all and he created
everything. The pinnacle of his creation was of man and woman.
Genesis 1:27 says that "God created man in His own image, in the
image of God He created Himself - male and female He created
Him."
The creation of man and woman in God's image makes us the
crowning glory of his creation. Nothing else was created in His
image. While we see the glory of God in his creation (Romans
1:20) human beings were created bearing the image of God. (Imagio
Deo)
Amongst all the blessings that come from this are two of immense
significance. (1) "Humanity was commissioned to be fruitful and
multiply and fill the earth..." (Genesis 1:28) that is to
procreate. (2) "To subdue the earth and have dominion over it."
(Genesis 1:28) Humanity is not just a part of an accident that
happens to have evolved to superior intelligence, which is what
the secularists say, but we were created by God to manage and
supervise the whole of the created order both for our benefit
and His glory.
It is the first of these Christian ordinances that we address
with our title, "God's Design for Marriage and Family".
Our Sexuality
God created us as sexual beings - male and female. He did so
that we might have personal intimate relationships with each
other in union with one another as husband and wife. (Genesis
1:23-25) As the Anglican Book of Common Prayer says in the
blessing of a marriage "The bond and covenant of marriage was
established by God in creation and our Lord Jesus Christ adorned
this manner of life by his presence and first miracle at a
wedding in Cana of Galilee. It signifies to us the mystery of
the union between Christ and his Church and Holy Scripture
commends it to be honored among all people."
"The union of husband and wife in heart, body, and mind is
intended by God for their mutual joy; for the help and comfort
given one another in prosperity and adversity; and, when it is
God's will, for the procreation of children and their nurture in
the knowledge and love of the Lord."
The Bible sets forth a profound concept. The relationship of a
husband and wife is seen as a human expression of the intimate
relationship we human beings are to have with God. (Ephesians
5:21-32)
"This is a profound mystery - but I am talking about Christ and
the church." (Ephesians 5:32). Unfaithfulness in a marriage is
used as a descriptor of our unfaithfulness to God, and in no
uncertain terms. "It is described as ‘whoring' after their
gods." (Exodus 34:15)
Marriage is set forth for us as spiritual, emotional and
physical intimacy in such a complete way as to be an
illustration of our intimacy with God; a relationship with total
surrender and trust.
Marriage and Procreation
Next, God's intention was that we in marriage bear offspring and
join Him in the procreation of other human beings. "……. God is
love." (1 John 4:8) God who is love created us out of love not
out of need. God conferred with Himself (Father, Son and Holy
Spirit) and said "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness,
and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the
air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the
creatures that move along the ground." (Genesis 1:26)
"Imagio Deo"
Who we are as human beings is a gift of God's love and a great
honor to be created after his likeness. That is to be: (1)
self-aware; to be self conscious, to be able to reflect on
ourselves and understand ourselves and to know who we are - just
as God did of Himself! No other part of the created order can do
this. (2) To be moral, understanding right from wrong, and to be
held accountable for what we do wrong and to have pleasure and
fulfillment in doing what is good and right. (3) To love one
another; as that love is expressed perfectly in the God-head,
and indeed to love one another as God has loved us. (4) To be
creative; to be able to imagine and to dream and to have the
power to be procreators as God Himself is creative. (5) As God
created us for his pleasure (Revelations 4:11) we are to give
Him pleasure (Psalm 149:4) and to both give pleasure and take
pleasure in our life together. All this is a great honor and a
great gift from God and is to be used to give Him glory.
Family - The Place to Raise Children
In God's scheme of things, the gift and heritage of children is
a blessing from God. "The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away;
may the name of the Lord be praised." (Job 1:21) (See also Psalm
127:3)
Three of the Ten Commandments impinge directly God's
understanding of family. Commandment 5 says, "Children are to
honor their father and mother." Commandment 7 says, "Thou shalt
not commit adultery." Commandment #10 says amongst other things
that, "Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife." How amazing it
would be if husband and wife were faithful to each other in
marriage and children would honor their parents.
One of the marks of Christian maturity and one of the
qualifications for Christian leadership is the quality of the
Christian home and family. "An elder must be blameless, the
husband of but one wife, a man whose children believe and are
not open to the charge of being wild and disobedient." (Titus
1:5-6)
To Align With the Design
It follows from a biblical insistence that human sexuality as
expressed in the human family is God's idea and that God
commands and directs how we are to live out our sexuality in the
family.
I say to couples as I counsel them in preparation for marriage:
"Do you want a great marriage?" They always say "Yes, of
course." I then say: "Do you want an average marriage?" which
implies mediocrity. They always say "No." (I do have to comment
in passing that for a lot of marriages, "average" would look
good since there is such pain and distress in too many homes.)
Then I go on to say "If you want a great marriage, since God is
the designer of marriage you want to do it His way."
It all sounds so obvious, but sexual unfaithfulness in marriage
has produced the horrors of a society, in which half the
children in the United States are growing up in single-parent
homes. It is no wonder that the number one cause of death
amongst adolescents is suicide. The confusion that comes from
broken promises and infidelity are evident in our society,
amongst our children, and not the least, in the brokenness of
divorced people.
Sexual Promiscuity
"Sexual promiscuity, especially in the adolescent community has
created an epidemic of sexually transmitted diseases" quoted
from the book, "Epidemic" written by Meg Meeker. Need
statistical info.
Pornography
Pornography is perhaps the most destructive immoral force in our
society today. It is a $4 Billion business which is as large, if
not larger than the monies that are made or spent on all major
sports, annually, including baseball, football, basketball and
hockey.
Inasmuch as pornography is a radically sick distortion of God's
intention for sex and how we sexually express ourselves, we have
a moral cancer spreading in a rapid and out of control fashion.
Homosexuality and Pedophilia
Homosexual behavior and Pedophilia are two very destructive
immoral forces in Western civilization. It is one thing for
Homosexuals to practice their deviant behavior contrary to God's
design, but it was not that long ago that it seemed unimaginable
that there would be a promotion of the Homosexual lifestyle
within our state-directed education system. Growing up into
adolescence is a complicated enough process under normal
circumstances, as young men and women pass through puberty into
adulthood, but when it is suggested that perhaps students may be
Homosexual in orientation, and that they should experiment with
a Homosexual behavior in the same way that Heterosexuals
experiment, and all this is further encouraged by the
availability of condoms and birth control measures, it is no
wonder that we have a proliferation of personality disorders as
well as sexually transmitted diseases. The Bible makes it very
clear that sex outside of marriage, (fornication) and sexual
unfaithfulness between married persons (adultery) and homosexual
behaviors are destructive to our human dignity, our
relationships, our personalities, our society, and above all,
are destructive to our relationship with God Himself. Romans
1:22-23 sums it up this way: "Although they claimed to be wise,
they became fools and exchanged the glory of the immortal God
for images made to look like mortal man and birds and animals
and reptiles," describing the ensuing chaos of doing things our
way rather than God's way.
God's Redeeming Love
Amazingly, astoundingly, mercifully, "But God demonstrates his
own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ
died for us. Since we have now been justified by his blood, how
much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through him! For
if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him
through the death of his Son, how much more, having been
reconciled, shall we be saved through his life! Not only is this
so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ,
through whom we have now received reconciliation." (Romans
5:8-11)
Again, as if almost beyond belief, it is possible "to become a
new creation," (2 Corinthians 5:17) as the Lord Jesus Christ put
it - "to be born again." (John 3:3).
The good news of the gospel is that God can heal and forgive the
brokenness of divorce, can transform children coming out of
broken homes and make them agents of renewal themselves. That
young people who have lost their virginity can begin again and
in a very real sense receive a second virginity, and start a
whole new way of living that can pass from one generation to
another.
Let me speak from personal experience. I am the son of a Godless
home, growing up in England. We never went to church. We had no
Bible. We never prayer together. Because we received some
religious education in our public school system and because the
British were still living within the context of an assumed
Christian morality as a Nation, I did grow up knowing right from
wrong and had some information about God and the Christian
faith.
What we experienced in microcosm in my family, is what it seems
society at large experiences today. My mother was unfaithful to
my Dad while I was still a little boy of 6. When I was 7 my
father committed suicide because he did not know how to live
with the shame of my mother's unfaithfulness. My mother married
again. That marriage ended in divorce, and I lived through the
misery of my mother and stepfather's squabbling. The product of
those two marriages was five children, of which I am the oldest.
At age 18 because of the witness of a man to the gospel of
Christ and the Lord's power to transform a life, and then
hearing Billy Graham preach in London, Jesus Christ came into my
life. I was born again of His Holy Spirit and began a whole new
life.
As a result of my coming to faith, not only did I go into the
Christian ministry as a preacher, pastor and evangelist, but I
married a wonderful Christian woman, Kathleen Heggar. We have
four amazing daughters, three of whom have been or are, in a
professional ministry.
Wonderfully, my mother came to faith in the Lord Jesus, and
experienced His forgiveness. One day, at a preaching mission in
England, she walked down the aisle to publicly give her life to
Christ. I was at the front of the auditorium directing
counselors to those who were making professions of faith. It was
overwhelming to have my mother walk down that aisle and into my
arms.
My brother Tony, closest to me in age, became a radiant
Christian, partly because of his seeing and experiencing what
God had done in my life and in my family. My brother's wife,
Christine came to faith and is a devoted follower of Christ.
They, together have used their home for evangelistic meetings
using the Alpha Group as their means of sharing their faith.
My sister Mary, the youngest of my siblings, along with her
husband and their two children have come to faith, and are
having a tremendous impact on their home town, Knoxville, TN.
All I can exclaim is "To God be the glory, great things he has
done."
So, let me close with those encouragements! In these chaotic and
immoral times with the erosion of absolute values and the
promotion of relativism, the only hope for a reversal of the
public moral decline in our Nation is the preaching of God's
word, the upholding of God's truth, and bearing testimony to the
gospel of Jesus Christ which is the power of God for salvation.
We must seek to have laws of the land reflect the standards and
truth of God's word, but ultimately one cannot legislate
morality and have people then yield to that legislation. As
Benjamin Franklin said, "Bad people will always find their way
around good laws, but good people will find a way to make bad
laws work." How then to get more good people!!
Clearly, we need a moral reformation in America. But the only
way to a moral reformation is a spiritual awakening, and the
only way to a spiritual awakening is the preaching of the gospel
and the only people who can preach the gospel are those that
know and love the Lord Jesus.
Rise up O men of God,
Have done with lesser things.
Give heart and mind and soul and strength
To serve the King of kings. |
